Have You Ever...

Have you ever been shit on? I mean, not the "I-feel-like-i've-been-shit-on-cause-my-
coworker-dumped-a-load-of-work-on-me" shit on, but literally been shit on? Wait...don't answer that.
Well, i know what it's like to be shit on. Carla and I worked out tonight. We hit the Smoothie joint next door to enjoy a tasty smoothie. We chatted for a bit and then I walked Carla back to her car. On that trek, a friggin' pigeon dropped a dollop of butt pudding right on my shoulder. Although, the first 3 seconds i didn't realize that. I thought it was one of the flying insects that were buzzing the lights that night. But when it didn't move, i tilted my head to the left to see a tri-colored plop of the freshest bird poop in the local Friendswood area.
Carla just burst into uncontrollable laughter...in fact, i'm willing to bet she's still laughing right now. You see, she saw the whole tragic episode unfold in the proverbial slow motion. She laughed and laughed and cried and nearly snarfed and nearly peed her pants. I don't think she could even breathe.
Ok, so, yeah, it was really that funny.

Have you ever...